Everytime I go for a walk to clear my head, I wonder if i’ll make it back. Not because i’ll try to do something.. Because my mind is such a mess recently I forget who I am, where I am or what i’m doing. Walking infront of a car or falling down in childwall woods would probably be an accident.
Thank you for taking time out of your day/evening to write this. Hope you’re well xx
This made me smile xD
Anon I met his family today.. I’m a psychology nerd, I know first impressions are important.. I was so nervous :,) but whoever you are, i owe you so much.. Thank you for everything you’re helping me with. I appreciate it so much! You’re amazing!
Im fucking things up before its even begun :,)
Josh came out with me an my mum tonight. We went outside so he could smoke and he asked me about Lee :(.
Lee was one of the first friends I made in Uni and we had a… Fling.. But we fell out and recently started talking again. We’re just friends but Josh overheard me talking about him to my friend at a gathering the other day..
I wont bore you with the details but you can see where this is going..
Josh said he trusts that we are just friends and I can talk to whoever I like and be friends with whoever I like but his gestures told a different story :/
Ohhhh Ashleigh, what’ve you done…
If you’re the same anon from all of the previous messages, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
What am I supposed to say anon? :,( hes going on holiday soon and I dont know if im going to be here when he gets back because every day it gets worse. The thoughts, the pain, disgust and hate.. Im trying as best I can but it never seems to be enough.